I know I have nothing to add to the debate about the Silence of God in suffering. There is nothing original I could say about it. And Im not particularly well read on it right now, so I dont have any intelligent insights. But I have certainly been struggling with it. God seems exceedingly cruel to me right now. Last night I watched the first part of Spike Lee's "When the Levees Broke," a fascinating documentary on the events surrounding Hurricane Katrina. All I could think about was how much life sucks for so many people. You can build your whole life and have it all washed away in a huge natural disaster.
And then there's death, the worst natural disaster of all. Who can escape it? For most people (if the Bible is true) it will only mean more death, an eternity of death, filled with incalculable pain and sorrow. And Im supposed to swallow this? Im supposed to believe that countless millions of lives are born into this world to suffer and die and then to suffer all the more, and Im supposed to believe this from a God who is silent and remains mysteriously veiled behind a book.
Trust me, Ive read Job and Romans and CS Lewis enough times to know what any Christian has to say to me about this subject. God is soveriegn and holy and just and who can question Him? It doesnt make it any easier to accept. Im asked to accept that I belong to a ridiculously miniscule remnant of humans who are the only humans in the history of the earth who can actually hope for something other than an eternal existence defined by horrible, horrible agony. And ultimately this is all because two people that we have never met ate a piece of fruit. What the hell (literally!)? Why do we wash this over so often? Why do Christians speak so much of shallow comfortable feelings, and refuse to stare death and the reality of hell in the face! Why can we waste so much time with such meaningless jabber in our churches and Christian circles?
I was reading Numbers 5 the other day. Do we ever think about the fact that if a woman in ancient Israel was accused of committing adultery, she had to drink a cup of filthy water in order to prove that she was innocent. If she got sick, then she was guilty. If she didnt get sick, she was innocent. Shouldnt that upset us? I mean, sure, we can believe that God was sovereign over all of this and that He only ever allowed the guilty woman to get sick. But shouldnt we find that hard to believe? Surely we would find a practice like this ridiculous, superstitious, and downright cruel if we used it in our churches today. But we so readily accept stories like these from the Bible. And we so readily give God the benefit of the doubt. Sure God. Make them drink filthy water. And then stone them if they get sick. Will do.
Im not denying God, but I have to confess, He makes me angry sometimes. Why does He allow so much suffering? Why does He appear so cruel so much throughout the Bible? Why does He condemn so many? If He was planning to redeem the world from sin, why didnt He do so much sooner? Why did He postpone redemption for thousands of years, just so that the overwhelming majority of humans who would be born could be born into an existence destined for damnation.
And Im mad at Christians. We accept answers to these questions far too readily without any sense of wrestling with the reality of what is being asked. We seek comfort too quickly without feeling the utter discomfort and disgust that these questions should provoke. Life sucks. Death sucks worse. This is the reality for most humans according to the Christians creeds. But we are willing to read a couple of Lewis books and go home to read Narnia to our kids, and live in a complete Christian fantasy, telling ourselves that life is supposed to be filled with one joy after another, if we only have faith, and that death will bring the greatest joy of all. Oh God, I certainly hope that is true, but I wont accept it without a fight.
Posted by todd at January 15, 2007 11:11 AM