I was talking to someone the other day about why we apparently came from "different worlds." You see, I am a Christian and this person wasnt so we were talking about how hard it was for us to understand each other. Now I suppose when it comes down to it we were really talking about the fact that we have a completely different set of friends. I have a predominately Christian set of friends who live a certain way and this person has a predominately non-Christian set of friends who live another way. Thus we are from "different worlds."
But having different types of friends doesnt really make us all that much different, does it? I mean even when I was at a Christian college I related to a certain group of friends while there were other groups I wasnt able to relate to much at all.
And as far as our personal lives are concerned we really have a lot in common. We are both confused people in our late twenties with a lot of bad junk in our background who have done a lot of things we regret.
So what is the answer? What makes our worlds so different?
Well, as I delved further into the conversation I realized that the fundamental difference was how we felt about death. This person (at least on the surface) isnt too concerned about death and believes that there is no such thing as life after death and that this life is all we have and so we should just make the most of it. This person also did not seem bothered by the prospect of fading out of existence. After all, if we arent conscious of not existing, why should we care?
I, on the other hand, am (perhaps unhealthily) obsessed with death, and I simply cannot be content with the idea of losing my existence after death. The idea of everything I have ever known and experienced in this life just disappearing is the saddest thing I can possibly imagine. To have tasted this life and then to just lose it seems incomprehensible to me at times. Even as I type this message there is SO MUCH going on around me. I am hearing the voices of other people, the whirring of machines, and the sound of my fingers clicking against the keyboard. I can see trees outside my window and people walking by me and all kinds of gadgets and gizmos that other people like me have made laying all about my desk. And thats just a minute of my time. Life is so unbearably big sometimes, and I cant sit back and be all right with the idea of just letting it go.
And I can understand my friend's perspective. After all, the only thing we ever see from our end is death. People go away and they never come back. We bury or cremate their bodies and those bodies one way or another return to dust. The fact that this IS going to happen to me at some point is a lot to stomach. I am going to lose consciousness and any connection with my body, at least temporarily. And my only hope is that at that point I will somehow, by powers completely outside of my control, regain consciousness and reinhabit a body, thus reclaiming life. Ive never seen this happen to anybody. Ive heard about it happening to a some people, particularly ONE person 2000 years ago, and I find my sources to be pretty reliable. But nevertheless, Ive never seen it happen and I would have no idea what it would be like when it does happen. Its really a huge unknown, a total mystery when you think about it.
But then again, I know that Jesus faced this predicament Himself. Despite the fact that Jesus is God, you kind of get the notion that the outcome of His death was uncertain to Him in the garden of Eden. Lets face it. Jesus seemed scared and unsure of Himself. Perhaps God would take the cup from Him, somehow. But if God did not take the cup from him, then at least God's will would be done. And Jesus was willing to accept that will, whatever it was. Jesus was completely and totally abandoning Himself to the will of God, whatever the outcome may be. Jesus believed He would be resurrected but it was also completely out of His hands. It wasnt up to Him at all. He had to surrender Himself to the mercy and power of His Father. He would simply die and then hope He would somehow wake up. He faced death head-on as each man has to. And it is in this way that He completely sympathizes with our weaknesses.
Rambling I know. But good thoughts to chew on.